‘Ageing gracefully’ - Oh my God! How can this be possible? As I am ageing, I have started doubting the sentiments behind this adage. The mirror doesn’t allow my soul to adhere to this thought. The wrinkling face and hands, the greying hair and the sagging skin are a few malicious symptoms of ageing which when reflected by the mirror make me shudder at the image presented. Oh! That was a jolt to my mind which at no cost is ready to come to terms with this ghastly image. All because of this so-called ageing. And then, just imagine it being graceful. It seems as if my grit is being checked. And then the continuous conflict between the joyous youthful fabrications of my mind and the incongruous reality. People around me contribute generously towards this lofty cause. They have bestowed me with the noble title that of ‘aunty’. Neither do vendors and maids shy away from showing their respect. Children and the newly-weds come and touch my feet missing the effect of their sweet gesture upon me. It seems as if the whole world is conspiring against me and wants me to awaken out of my youthful peaceful slumber.
Lo and behold! Finally the effort of all pays and I gradually let the feeling of getting old sink in though it i" a compulsive acceptance .
However this half acceptance makes me probe ways or find a magic wand to counter this ageing process and I land up at a beauty salon to have facials, dyeing and colouring of hair, manicure, pedicure, Botox and surgery being the extension for many. I, too, don’t leave any stone unturned to retain my eroding youthfulness which is being eroded everyday by the ravaging time. I let my budget go topsy-turvy and change my priorities. After all what is the moolah for? What more discretionary use of the hard earned money of my husband can be? So what if beauty is skin deep? I have to possess a flawless face. The flaws of character can be borne but not of the sin. With great determination taking up all cudgels, I armour myself to combat this ageing. Poor ‘Grace’ has no role in my mission.Woman’s vanity would be at stake if I accept to age gracefully. Won’t the cosmetic industry suffer if all the Aunties start ageing gracefully? A grave issue indeed! Even in my 50’s I am unconvinced about growing old. Joints ache! That is because of lack of exercise. Eyesight has weakened! Oh! That’s simply lack of nutrition. I have explanations for all the maladies except for this ‘graceful ageing’.
However deep inside me I, too, am waiting for the day when I would totally surrender to this idea with full belief that there is no escape now and to be prepared for the hierarchical climb in my being termed as 'Mataji'. May God bless me with sadbhudi to accept that!
To see one’s thoughts & sentiments and emotions in print puts one on cloud nine. one's ego is inflated and the pride knows no bounds. How does one justify the feeling of having achieved laurels in one’s own eyes, Is it the extension of narcissism or the hunger lurking deep inside us for appreciation by fellow human beings or mere pangs of feeling superior to others. However the urge to be recognized and be famous is certainly gratified by venting our thoughts this way. Conforming to one reason or perhaps all I too am joining this league of would be famous authors in the belief that churnings of my mind might appeal to others also apart from me.